Night Bread

Now that I'm operating on a polyphasic sleep schedule, I am following my instincts on what to do in the late hours formerly filled by sleep.  I find the easiest thing to do is clean and organize.  My attention is more focused on what is at hand as opposed to what I'll be doing tomorrow.  I notice things around me and things that need attention much more than I used to when I only slept once a day.  While cleaning out the pantry the other day, I found a yeast packet with a bread recipe.  The recipe was very simple, and I already had all the ingredients.  Last night I made bread from scratch.  Cooking is very easy to do in a clutter free kitchen.  My problem before was I never had time to both clean up the clutter and prevent new clutter from immediately taking its place.  Now that I have lots of time and the patience to deal with clutter, I could clean up my kitchen and have space for baking.  Baking the bread gave me something to concentrate on so that I would not get bored and then tired.

I used the extra activity to try to push past midnight and reduce my core sleep.  I stayed up an extra two hours from what I've been doing, but then I slept an hour later than I planned.  The problem with waking up during time which I previously only used for sleep is that my mind does not recognize any pressing need to stay awake.

When I did awake from core sleep, I tried the bread, and it was delicious.  I know that eating bread (especially wheat bread) is not part of the Primal Blueprint plan to eat mostly meat and non-grain plants, but the fact that I made it myself is enough reason to enjoy it.  This bread was much thicker than bread from the store.  It is something I can eat over a long period of time instead of within two or three days as meat and vegetable dishes require.

Even though I overslept a bit (no Pilates this morning), I still feel like I made progress toward the Uberman sleep schedule since I found something to do in between midnight and 2am.  The challenge I face with the sleep reduction is not fatigue, it is finding a use for the time.  I started this plan to see if I could manifest more time for pursuing my interests.  Bread baking is certainly something I would do more often to increase my homemade food supply.

Polyphasic Sleep

Polyphasic sleep is a brain hack.  The goal is to spread sleep out into naps throughout the day while decreasing the time of the nighttime core sleep.  The pinnacle of success is the Uberman sleep schedule in which you only sleep for 20 minutes once every 4 hours for a total of 2 hours of sleep a day.  I had heard about the ability to sleep a mere 2 hours a day from various sources such as history (Napoleon Bonaparte, Leonardo Da Vinci, Ben Franklin) and yoga which claims that meditation and proper diet can reduce the need for sleep.  It was not until I found Steve Pavlina's blog about his experience with polyphasic sleep that I thought it was either possible or practical.  He stressed that starting a polyphasic sleep schedule would be easiest on a vegan diet and a schedule more flexible than the standard 40 hour work week.  I became intrigued by the benefits like having more time and being better able to focus waking time.

I first thought about the time gained from trying polyphasic sleep.  What would I do with an extra 6 hours every day?  Would I be able to find enough worthwhile activity to fill a 22 hour day, or would I be better off working on my standard 16 hour day time management?  The real first step to sleeping polyphasically is to assess how you spend your current waking hours.  I started becoming more conscious of how much I really could do with my time.  I often fall into the trap of becoming anxious about running out of energy.  It frustrates me that I consistently get sleepy throughout the day even after getting plenty of sleep at night.  Just by changing my perspective to imagine life from a polyphasic view, I gained incredible insight on how I could take conscious control of my time and make it work for me instead of just being an obstacle to pass through.

I have been working my way through an adjustment period of polyphasic sleep.  I started by napping in the day time.  I set my watch timer for 20 minutes and give myself the freedom to check out of consciousness for a while.  At work, I worked harder during normal working time and used my lunch break to try napping.  I can close the door to my office for privacy, but the thought of sleeping at my desk still seems wrong.  However, the alternative of getting so tired that I spend about an hour a day just staring into space seems a much greater waste of time.  I have since learned that I can easily spend my half hour lunch break on a 20 minute nap and 10 minutes of eating.  I always bring my own lunch since I view going out for lunch every day as an excessive waste of time, money, and gasoline.

My sleep schedule is a cross between Uberman and Everyman schedule.  Everyman is the warm up to Uberman that allows for a longer core sleep at night in addition to multiple day naps.  I set up times to sleep every 4 hours: 4, 8, and 12 o'clock intervals, give or take a half hour.  At midnight, I stay asleep through the time of the next nap, but if I wake up early, then I stay awake and continue the same nap-wake cycles.  I go to work early to account for an afternoon break nap and stay until my regular time.  So far, I feel really refreshed by the naps and miss long sleeps less and less.  A good set of adjustment schedules can be found here.  I don't feel constrained by an adjustment deadline so migrating from a siesta schedule to Uberman seems a feasible plan.

One of the advantages to more time awake is that I no longer have the excuse that I don't have time to exercise.  I can do a few minutes of a workout video in the morning, take a walk in the evening, and still have time to do yoga at night.  The exercise keeps me alert and makes me feel better about being awake.  I plan to continue this sleep pattern for a while longer, and maybe break up the core sleep into 2 distinct naps.  I find the challenge of controlling my sleep invigorating and feel that I am learning so much about myself and existence in the process.  I have had a huge leap in creativity, and I take advantage of that by spending a lot of time writing.

Yoga

Yoga is something I've enjoyed doing ever since I learned I was doing it already.  My favorite yoga poses are from the book Yoga Mind and Body from the Sivinanda Yoga Vedanta Center.  The shoulder stand is a pose I have been practicing since childhood.  I would do mock headstands by leaning back, kicking my feet in the air, propping up my back, and trying to get my feet as far up as possible.  This book fascinated me by its simple yet challenging poses.  Also, there are lots of vegetarian recipes that are very delicious.  After a few weeks of practice, I had gained tremendous flexibility and mastered the true headstand pose along with the other 11 asanas.

I don't practice yoga often.  My number one excuse for not practicing was lack of space.  The second reason was lack of time.  One reason I find it hard to start doing yoga after taking a long break is that the headstand (the first of the 12 asanas) is so challenging.  The headstand is not for the faint of heart.  It is hard to get into the position and even harder to stay there for long.  For the past few years, when I try to complete a headstand, the furthest I can get is halfway.  This is discouraging since I used to be able to do it consistently.  The problem is I don't do yoga consistently enough when I start it up again.

I went through the 12 asanas last night and did not feel bad about the balance failures.  When  I finally figured out how to do the headstand years ago, I did not succeed the first time I tried.  Nor the second, nor the third.  In fact I had to pace myself and work up to a full headstand in stages.  Remembering that helps me get through the yoga workout by focusing on getting a workout habit going.  I can't get better if I never start.

Oatmeal Pancakes from Scratch

I love cooking from scratch.  When I really want to satisfy a particular craving, I can make it even if I don't have the exact ingredients required.  I searched online for oatmeal pancakes, but all the recipes called for buttermilk.  So I looked up how to substitute for buttermilk.  The solution was 3/4 cup of yogurt and 1/4 cup of milk.  I followed the Oatmeal Pancake recipe on allrecipes.com and substituted the buttermilk for a 6 ounce serving of strawberry yogurt and a quarter cup of milk.  I also substituted whole wheat flour for all-purpose.  The batter was thicker than regular pancakes because of the oats so when I put it in the pan, I spread it out evenly flat.  I cooked it at a lower temperature than non-oat pancakes because it took longer for the bubbles to rise through the pancake.  When there were several bubbles, I flipped the pancake and then put a lid on the pan.  Since the pancakes turned out so thick, I used the steam to ensure the inside was cooked.

The result was fruity flavored, delicious, and filling.  I prefer this recipe to a store bought pancake mix.  As an added bonus, I made these pancakes with a local chicken egg.  My husband received some eggs from a coworker who raises her own chickens.  

Habit Forming

I used to think that forming habits was something that I could just brute force my way through.  It was a strategy that worked for some time.  My most effective way of breaking a habit is quitting cold turkey.  The problem is that cold turkey doesn't hold up on its own.  Breaking a habit leaves a void in both time and emotion.  It's difficult to keep justifying to your mind the reasons why you quit doing something because after a while, you will miss the positive effects that weren't as obvious with all the negative effects present.

I used to smoke cigarettes.  I quit countless times.  I tried to quit even more than that.  Normally, I would smoke half a pack a day.  When I quit cold turkey, I would be very motivated to squash the habit for a month.  After a month, I was so focused on thinking about not smoking that I forgot why I quit.  The time I normally spent smoking was replaced with a time void of boredom.  There were many reasons why I quit, and they varied each time I took a break from it: expensive, stinky, inconvenient, impolite, unhealthy.  When I finally did quit for good, it was because I was sick and I intentionally focused all my hatred of the sickness on the smoking because I knew it made me equally miserable.  Constantly having to clear my throat was not my idea of pleasant living.  What made me stay quit was adapting my thinking at each stage of clarity.  Nicotine takes a week to fully leave your system.  I've heard that breaking or starting a habit takes 21 days.  I took note of these time frames when I quit the final time.  I used my initial motivation for the first week, then after that I started spending more time thinking about what I honestly wanted versus what I was doing.  I thought about the negative effects like the terrible smell.  I surrounded myself with pleasant smells to remind myself what I would not be able to smell if I smoked.  I focused on healthy living - what it's like to be healthy as opposed to just avoiding causes of bad health.  A person can be healthy by just not drinking and smoking and eating too much junk food, but someone who chooses to take action in the positive direction instead of staying neutral has more stake in staying healthy.  I eventually replaced the habit of smoking with the habit of being healthy.  I may not always be living as healthy as possible, but I am far more resistant to actions that would harm me.

Starting a habit is just as hard as quitting one.  Instead of leaving a void that would need to be filled, you give up time on something else that you used to do.  Walking my dog is one habit that I strive to keep going.  I normally watch TV all evening.  My favorite mode of entertainment is watching TV shows on DVD.  It's hard to stop watching when the stories are so compelling and available.  I realized that I was just making excuses for not walking on a daily basis.  Then I thought about what I would gain by walking my dog everyday as opposed to watching TV.  I gave it a week of just trying to walk him every evening.  Now he is more calm all the time and doesn't behave like a spaz as often.  I still get to watch the same amount of TV, but now I pace myself and find that I like it better that way.  Now even if I feel exhausted I go for a walk anyway because I know that I will feel better afterwards.  By keeping that expectation in mind, the habit becomes easier to keep as time goes on.

Habit forming is more about anticipation than getting a specific result.  If you put a stigma of exhaustion on the thought of performing the habit, you are only conditioning yourself to quitting.  There are more effects tied to a repeated action than just the ones you think about.  Doing something once has a different effect than doing something multiple times.  Unhealthy habits can take years to show the consequences, but small signs of danger can show up sooner than later if you pay attention.  One habit I'm trying to quit at work is eating all the free sweets they give away; donuts, cookies, and hot cocoa are freely available.  When I think about what all that sugar does in the long run - diabetes, heart disease, obesity - it makes it easier to resist.  It's hard to eat a doughnut when thinking about having to stick myself with a needle every day to test my blood sugar levels as a diabetic.  I don't have diabetes, and don't have a family history of it, but it's still possible for me to acquire the disorder.  Additionally, every time I say no to a doughnut, I am openly advocating that it's okay to say no (just say no to the dough!), and for someone more prone to diabetes, it may be all the encouragement they need to say no as well.

Knowing more about the effects of a habit can save you time in the long run by improving your resolve and cutting out your temptation to give up.

Going Green - What does it mean to you?

The phrase "Going Green" gets tossed around a lot these days.  It is especially noticeable in corporate advertising.  Every company wants the public to know that they are doing everything they can to be more green and friendly to the environment.   When I was growing up the popular environmental catch phrase was "Reuse, Reduce, Recycle."  It baffles me when I hear the word "recycle" being used where one of the other two words would be more appropriate.  A lot of people say they are going to recycle their grocery bags by repurposing them as trash bags or disposing of pet waste.   It's not recycling if it winds up in the trash. That drives me crazy!

Going green for me means more than just a display of affection for the planet - more than just showing off. I think about the big picture and look for ways to make improvements one small change at a time. It's not enough to make sporadic gestures. Habits make a bigger impact due to repetition.

One habit I work hard to keep going is using reusable bags when I buy groceries. The hardest part about that habit was starting it. It felt weird to carry a bag into the store and even weirder to stop the checker or bagger to switch bags. I had previously tried requesting paper bags, but I found I was no more likely to reuse those than plastic bags. Week after week of putting both kinds of bags into the recycle bin, I realized I had to do something differently. The reusable bags are a dollar and are very sturdy and easy to carry. Not only can the bags be reused, but they also hold a lot of food.

Reusable grocery bags are a small contribution to protecting the planet and also affordable. Going green often gets confused for impractical because of the expense of recycling and redesigning products. It's easy to go green and save money at the same time. Don't worry if you try to start this habit and find you forget the bags 90% of the time you get to the checkout. Start slow: buy one bag and use regular bags for what doesn't fit. Over time, if you remember to keep bring the bag and still need more bags, get one more. Rinse repeat. I have 2 bags that I use at Kroger. When I bought the second bag, I went through another forgetful phase before remembering to take them on every grocery trip.

The best thing you can do to go green is to keep going. Once you establish a green habit, you'll find it easy to create another one.

Omnivore by Choice

I used to think that going vegan was the ultimate way to live harmoniously with the planet.  I tried this philosophy (it really is more than just a diet), but it took more self-discipline than I had at the time.  The Primal Blueprint has a very interesting viewpoint.  I stumbled upon this philosophy when searching for ways to keep my energy levels continuously up.  The trick to this method is to train your body to live off your fat stores instead of a constant stream of carbohydrates.  It's very efficient in theory: just think of fat cells as tiny camel humps that can be filled during times of abundance and drained as needed by the body.  It is not a no carb diet.  Yes, there is a lot of protein consumption going on with all those animals being eaten.  Yet there is also a strong reliance on fruit and vegetable intake.  The key element is it cuts out grain.  I thought cutting out cheese for a vegan diet was challenging, but cutting grain out of an American diet sounds impossible.  It's not necessary to completely go without, just cut back.  It's a tricky transition, one that I have yet to make, but I believe it's possible.  Of course it also helps that the plan only requires 80% compliance, so an occasional birthday cake is completely fine.

But what about the animals?  Aren't you hurting them by subjecting them to a fate of slaughter?  No.  Factory farming is the real enemy of the vegan.  Factory farming is the enemy of the human race.  The real danger of meat consumption is the poison being dumped into the food supply by unsustainable practices such as factory farming.  Plants honestly don't fare much better.  Big Agra (industrial agriculture) poisons the food supply to kill weeds and pests and to preserve the food for global trade.  That's one of the main reasons why I advocate backyard farming: eat what you grow, and you know what goes into your food.

Backyard farming is not limited to plants.  Many cities have ordinances that allow for chickens and rabbits to be kept in the yard, given enough space is kept between the livestock and their human neighbors (including the owner).  The Little Rock ordinance allows for the keeping of hens as long as they are at least 10 feet from the owner's house and 25 feet from the closest neighbor's house.  I have measured my yard, and I do qualify for this.  I can keep up to four hens, but I think three will be a good maximum for me.  Each bird requires three square feet of space, so the bare minimum for three birds will be one square yard (or meter for those metrically inclined).  From my perspective, a chicken coop sounds like an exciting opportunity to meld engineering with artistic design to create more of a chicken "resort" while making the best use of limited space.  Essentially I can't haphazardly add rooms to my own house, but I can design a comfortable home for chickens to lay their eggs.  Little Rock does not allow roosters within the city limits, so the eggs are all cruelty free and the hens live a long happy life.

Rabbits are allowed in town as well.  Rabbits are useful to keep whether or not you decide to cull them for dinner.  They are the perfect garden companion since their waste can be added directly to soil without the need to compost for any length of time.  However, it is not so terrible to eat them either.  A rabbit provides the same amount of meat as a chicken.  Rabbits are easy to breed, take up little space, and are in fact quite healthy.  Before factory farming, rabbits were a common dinner in the average household.  Rabbits can be raised as humanely as chickens (fenced in rabbit resort), and if you should decide to cull them, that can be handled in a dignified manner as well.  If you do it yourself, at least you know how they are treated, unlike the mass slaughter that occurs in the factory farming industry.

If you are unable to keep small livestock on your property due to city ordinances or Home Owners Association rules, you can subscribe to a CSA (community supported agriculture) which allows you to join with others nearby to pay a farmer near town to grow crops and raise bigger livestock.  That way you can have eggs, milk, cheese, and even meat from a local source.  Some CSAs allow you to pay your share with time spent working on the farm.  Either way you pay, you can likely get to know the people growing your food and learn about their practices so you know what is going into the food that will be going into you.

My goal this year is to build a rabbit hutch for one so that I can have instant compost for my garden.  If the rabbit keeping goes well, I will build a chicken coop.  Breeding rabbits is the last stage of my ultimate urban farm, so until then I will try to purchase organic or natural meat from the grocery store.  For now I'm focused more on producing the plant base of my food chain.

Cold Weather Workouts

I tried jogging in the morning for a while, but the morning is not a good time to test my endurance.  In the morning I fly on autopilot through my routine, but cold and wet weather cut through my subconscious resolve.  If I don't have something to do indoors at those times, I often get bored and go back to bed.  Then even on the days that the weather is perfect, I feel no urge to get up early.

One way to take advantage of the cold weather indoor time is to do workout videos.  The main goal of working out is not to sculpt my body, although I'm sure that will be a result eventually, but instead I am exercising my stamina.  The video I'm currently working through is Gaiam's Cardio Pilates.  The real trick to exercise videos is to start out by doing small segments at a time.  There is no way I could do this entire video all at once in the current state of flab I live in.  I'm not that out of shape; I just don't exercise my core enough.  Pilates is an excellent way to work your core muscles.  Last year I worked out on the Total Gym for a few months and only went jogging sporadically.  When I did jog, it felt far easier to endure longer distances than when I just tried to jog without regular exercise.

Primal Blueprint law #4 is to lift heavy things.  I consider myself heavy enough (at 140 pounds), at least when I lift and hold as Pilates tends to encourage.  I don't need to add external weights to my workout because all I have to do is extend the time I balance myself to increase the difficulty.  Chronic cardio is a big no-no in the Primal Blueprint, but I do around 5 to 10 minutes of the Pilates video at a time.  Even though the video is Cardio Pilates, it's still just strength training for me.

One of my goals for 2012 is to run a 10k.  Fortunately, the Little Rock Marathon has replaced their relay race with a 10k.  There are lots of 5ks and half-marathons in Arkansas, but not many races are 10k.  I like the idea of stepping up in my endurance challenges.  I have run a few 5k races, and it is challenging.  But without the idea of a reachable next step, it's difficult for my mind to find the motivation to either continue 5k running or train up for the half-marathon.  I realize this is a mental crutch, but I'm trying to grow at a sustainable pace.  I could probably make it through a half-marathon at this point, but I would rather go into such a race having the experience of making it to the halfway point alive.  The marathon is in March, so I am making the most of my winter time with core training.

Catnip

Catnip is the easiest plant to cultivate.  All you need is dirt and patience.  I planted some catnip seeds in a container outside last Fall, and the catnip survived the winter.  What it did not survive was August and its 114°F temperatures.  It started dying in July and when the heat wave struck in August, I just pulled the whole plant out and tossed it in the compost.

I was really surprised in October when the catnip started growing again.  There are weeds growing in the same container, but I am not going to remove them because they are pretty.  The only weed I go out of my way to destroy is dandelion, but mostly because the leaves are very prickly.  I really can't stand thorns and anything else that will stab me.  The only exception is roses because they are very pretty and get more pretty when they are trimmed a lot.

I was able to harvest the catnip by cutting off a stem at the base and hanging it inside to dry.  I tied a string to the stem base and tied the other end of the string to a hanging lamp.  When all the leaves where dried, I pulled them off and put them in a jar.  The smell of fresh catnip is very different from the smell of dried catnip.  My cat was very excited to try some.  I let her play with the stem for a few days after taking the leaves off.  She loves it.

Catnip is in the mint family and it smells delightful.  I have not yet tried it in tea, but I will be doing so soon.

Leaf Composting

The trees are getting naked and dropping free mulch all over the yard. Driving around town today, I saw enough leaf bags to build a Great Wall. I am going to corral my leaves in the back corner of my yard over the winter so that they'll be ready to mix into garden beds in the spring.

My house is at the end of a circle drive and the backyard narrows down to a wedge on one side. There is a Crape Myrtle in front of the corner and a lot of trees overshadowing the area, too.  It's a terrible place to grow anything, but an excellent place to store some decomposing leaves. I had some wire fencing left over from a previous yard project so I used it to close in the corner to make a leaf bin. I nailed the wire to the wood fence by tacking in nails about halfway in, then bending them over the wire like a staple.  I don't have a staple gun for the job, but I do have plenty of nails and a fondness for using a hammer.  The fence took all of ten minutes to install.

Unused corner of the yard

Same corner with wire nailed in front of it.

Ta-Da! Leaf composting!

The wedge part of my yard used to be the dog pen, but my dog is bigger than the dog who previously resided here. My dog stays in the main part of the backyard. The wedge is my reserved garden space where I can build prototype contraptions and not worry about the dog going Godzilla on them. Also, I value a duty-free zone for my food crops and the ability to farm with clean shoes.

10 Reasons I Garden

1. Having something to do outside keeps me from wasting the day away inside.

2. Gardening is good exercise.

3. I feel a spiritual connection with the earth by working with it instead of just existing on it.

4. It's fun to experience the full seasonal cycle of the year.

5. I create something from nothing by multiplying what I sow. In fact I can even make use of once useless kitchen scraps by composting.

6. I get to eat what I grow.

7. I can see the whole lifespan of my food. I know what went into it so I know what I'm putting into my body.

8. I can grow vegetables I can't find in the grocery store.

9. Extra food can either be canned for later, sold, or donated.

10. Gardening provides useful survival skills. It's nice to know if I were left in the wilderness, I could cultivate food instead of just wander and starve. Also, I'd rather not resort to eating ants. :)

Best thing about Winter

I have to say the best thing about Winter is that it is followed by Spring!  As I watch the leaves fall and begin to see through the trees, I think of springtime and the new leaves that will form when it gets warm again.  Looking forward to Spring is what will get me through this Winter.  Last year I adopted my dog and enjoyed many challenging walks with him in the snow and ice.  I look forward to that challenge again this year.  If I had the garden I wanted already then around this time I would be canning vegetables to make it until the first Spring harvest.  Visualizing how I would spend my time working towards my goal of an epic food garden is good fuel for motivation.  After all, every change for the better starts with the dream to see it through.

Winter planning

Every year I want to plant a garden.  Every year I start too late and wonder why nothing produces.  I am an expert at creating excuses for not going outside.  Too hot. Too cold.  Mosquitoes.  Getting used to a 40 hour work week (after spending 3 months between graduation and employment leisurely enjoying my own schedule).

By the time Fall comes around, I wonder where the time went.  My favorite time to go outside is when it's not too hot or too cold, so Spring and Fall.  Getting a job was extremely important this past Spring, but I had recovered my energy by Fall and felt like starting a garden again.  Of course, that wouldn't work because Winter is just around the corner.  However, I can still use the drive to take action to give me the energy to learn about what action I can take and when to take it.  My birthday is in September so I asked for big terracotta pots.  Container gardening is much more viable in my yard.  I have sandy soil and am downhill from my neighbors which is a disaster in April rains.  I have read a lot online about urban farming, but I wanted more detail.  I bought Urban Farming by Thomas Fox.  I really enjoy that book because not only does it tell how to backyard farm, it gives compelling reasons why backyard farming is the right thing to do.  The scope goes far beyond trying to save money on tomatoes.  It feels more like a revolution.

Given that this is the holiday season traveling to visit family is inevitable for me this time of year, I have decided to hold off on gardening action until January.  Until then I can budget my time and resources and plan for action.  I've got a head start on the terracotta pots.  I don't want to start using them until after the freeze so they don't break.  I plan on building raised garden beds out of wood in January.  February would be a good time to start seeds indoors.  In between now and then, I have plenty of time to pack my brain full of ideas on what do grow and how to grow it.

Is your backyard working for you?

When my husband and I decided to go house hunting, my first priority was the gardening potential of the yard. I had lived in apartments for several years before we bought our house. Not only did I lack yard space, but I did not even live in the same place for more than a year. I was so excited to be getting a sizable yard with plenty of growing potential. I was happy to just maintain the plants that were already established since my initial focus was to finish my degree and find a desk job.

Once I found a job, I made a budget to pay off my student loans at a vigorous pace. While my husband had supported me in school, I didn't worry about finances because school was stressful enough. Once I started getting a paycheck, my self-reliance kicked in and I wanted to hold up my end of expenses while improving the efficiency of my budget. I started getting frugal. I started going without things I didn't see as neccesary to surviving. Mowing the lawn, for example seems like such a waste of energy for the reward of...looking nice? I would rather have food and keep some grocery money in my pocket. Besides, I consider fruit and vegetable plants far more aesthetically pleasing than a field of unused green.

My first garden project was growing a tomato plant in a topsy turvey planter. The whole reason I planted it was because I didn't like paying $2 for a tomato at the grocery store.

Unfortunately, I didn't give my plant quite the attention it needed. It didn't produce any fruit, though I didn't expect any the first year. I would have been overjoyed just to have it survive the blazing hot summer and my overgrown Shepard/Rottie pup. I had thought I trained him not to chew on the plant, but I noticed one day that half the plant was gone. I started to get mad at the dog, but then I saw the great big Tobacco Horn Worm (pictured in their plastic prison).

After dispatching the worm twins, I made a commitment to myself that I would put in a whole hearted effort to grow food in my yard in 2012. I am intrigued by the Primal Blueprint. I have tried vegan in the past, but the only thing that concerns me about meat is the toxins poured into animals by Big Agra. I found also that I can't sustain a vegan diet on a low budget and keep my energy level up high enough to want to continue trying. I've looked up my city ordinance and found that I can keep hens and rabbits.

I find this path as the challenge I have been craving my whole life. I spent the last decade wasting this drive on video games which crumbled my creativity, zest for life, and health to dust. I used to spend so much time wanting to live virtually that I forgot how amazing it feels to actually live my life and how empowering self-sufficiency can be.

Now is the time to test myself and see if I can truly survive what the future brings. Urban farming seems the most sensible way to spend my free time and creativity. Neccesity is the mother of invention. If I could create methods of running a backyard farm that I could sustain for many years, is humane, and good for the earth, then that knowledge is worth all the hardship of trying. And since I'm impatient, I'll be doing this while holding down a day job to pay off my existing debt.